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From me to you, highlighting challenges faced by girls

About

About

Hey there! My name is Terynn and I am the proud 42-year-young mother of three dear daughters (born 2002, 2004 and 2006) who are the inspirations for this blog. We live in Cole Harbour, Nova Scotia, Canada. If our hometown sounds familiar you are likely a Sidney Crosby fan, a Trailer Park Boys fan or have heard of Rehtaeh Parsons, the 17-year-old girl whose tragic death has thrust victim-blaming into the spotlight.

Growing up playing sports and not being a lover of Barbies and dresses, I constantly experienced challenges simply because I was a girl. I felt pressured to act and look a certain way simply because I was a girl. I didn’t like it then and I certainly don’t like that these same challenges and pressures still exist for my daughters.

The defining moment…

In 2012 I found a book in my daughter’s backpack. The back cover was blue and the front cover had an illustration of a boy sailing on the ocean in rough waters. It was entitled Stories for Boys. When my daughter saw me with the book, she blushed and quickly placed it back into her backpack. She confided that she was embarrassed that the book she had chosen from the school library was “for boys”. That was a defining moment for me. Although we had had many discussions about the ludicrous societal expectations and rules based on gender, I knew then I had to make it abundantly clear that she had nothing to be ashamed of. Girls can read adventure stories.

This is when Dear Daughters was born!

What I Want Readers to Learn from Dear Daughters

I want to show that strong, confident, successful women have always and will continue to exist in all areas of life. I want to introduce the struggles (new and old) faced by women and how close (or how far) we are to eliminating gender bias in the world. I want everyone to remember that every woman is somebody’s daughter. I want to show that gender bias occurs on a daily basis, and often we are unaware it is happening.

What I Don’t Want Readers to Take Away from Dear Daughters

I do not want people thinking that this is a male-bashing, men-are-no good-and-we-don’t-need-them-at-all type of blog. It is quite the opposite really. The hypermasculinization of boys and men in our society plays a huge role in the gender bias towards girls and women. We need to fix the ridiculous societal expectations and rules we have in place for boys and men just as much as we do the ones for girls and women.

What challenges do girls and women face on a daily basis?

1. The sexualization of their bodies and the importance that is put on their appearance. Girls and women are viewed as objects and/or possessions, increasing the likelihood that they will become victims of sexual and/or physical abuse and then ridiculed and blamed for what happened to them (victim-blaming).

This Film Shows What it Would Be Like to be a Man if Today’s Roles Were Reversed
7 Super Bowl Commercials That Don’t Get It #NotBuyingIt
A Short Video Demonstrating How Media Fails Women

2. The tendencies of people to try to “protect” girls and to impose limitations in their lives. Girls and women are not encouraged to be active, competitive and/or aggressive. They are constantly stereotyped and encouraged to fulfill caring and nurturing roles.

I Cannot Believe My Ears…Isn’t It 2013
13-year-old Convinces Hasbro to Create A Gender Neutral Easy Bake Oven
Your Votes Are in on Girly Girl

3. Being second-class citizens. Being a girl or doing anything “like a girl” is a negative thing.

“Like A Girl” Shouldn’t Be a Bad Thing
Mythbusters Tests the “Throws Like a Girl” Insult

4. Inequalities – Less pay for the same work. Denied or limited access to education. Arranged marriages. The list goes on and on.

14-year-old Malala Yousafzaui Was Shot For Promoting Education For Girls
It is Hard to Believe Women are Still Denied Access To Education in the Year 2012

Where to find me

When I am not writing, I am coaching soccer and ringette, playing hockey and serving as chauffeur to my three dear daughters. You can follow Dear Daughters on Twitter @DearDaughters, me on Twitter @writerbychoice1 and Instagram @writerbychoice and Dear Daughters on Facebook at facebook.com/DearDaughters.

Throwback Thursday – Lucy Stone and husband, Henry Blackwell

Posted by on Jan 8, 2015 in Daily Doses, Feminism, Notable Women, Throwback Thursday, Women's Rights Movement | 0 comments

Throwback Thursday – Lucy Stone and husband, Henry Blackwell

Lucy Stone (August 13, 1818 – October 19, 1893) was an abolitionist and suffragist. In 1847, she became the first woman from Massachusetts to earn a college degree. She was instrumental in helping to abolish slavery by helping to establish the Woman’s National Loyal League in order to help pass the Thirteenth Amendment. Along with her husband, Henry Blackwell, she then helped to form the American Woman Suffrage Association. Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Susan B. Anthony formed the National Woman Suffrage Association (NWSA) to secure...

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Tally Tuesday – What Family Name Should The Children Have?

Posted by on Dec 30, 2014 in Daily Doses, Tally Tuesdays | 0 comments

Tally Tuesday – What Family Name Should The Children Have?

If you are into genealogy you know how difficult it is to trace the family line of any of your female ancestors unless you know the last names of the men in their lives. Why is it that we live in such a patriarchal society? Please give us your two cents regarding the last names of children – whose last name should they have? Create your free online surveys with SurveyMonkey , the world’s leading questionnaire tool. If you haven’t answered last week’s survey Will You or Did You Take Your Partner’s Name?, please...

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#morethanwhatyousee Monday

Posted by on Dec 29, 2014 in #morethanwhatyousee Monday, Daily Doses | 0 comments

#morethanwhatyousee Monday

Girls, boys, women and men, join us on #morethanwhatyousee Monday and let’s take the focus off of our bodies! Tweet something you love about yourself or that people may not know about you, that has nothing to do with your appearance, using the hashtag #morethanwhatyousee If you have a blog please feel free to share the link each and everytime you tweet on #morethanwhatyousee Monday. I once considered a profession as a criminal behaviour analyst studying serial killers #morethanwhatyousee Monday http://t.co/ADfciGz5w8 — Dear Daughters...

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#morethanwhatyousee Monday

Posted by on Dec 22, 2014 in #morethanwhatyousee Monday, Daily Doses | 0 comments

#morethanwhatyousee Monday

#morethanwhatyousee Monday is for boys and men too! Spread the word! Let’s take the focus off our bodies and start celebrating each other for the wonderful people we are! I love words but I work with numbers all day long to pay the bills! #morethanwhatyousee Monday http://t.co/ADfciGz5w8 — Dear Daughters (@DearDaughters) December 22, 2014 Share this:Share on...

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Food For Thought Friday – Marital Name Change

Posted by on Dec 19, 2014 in Daily Doses, Feminism, Food For Thought Friday, Women's Rights Movement | 0 comments

To change or not to change your name when you get married, that is the question. Unfortunately it seems to be a question for only one person in a heterosexual marriage – the woman! In same-sex marriages there is no gender inequality going on so each person in that relationship ponders the same question(s): 1. Should we share the same last name when we marry? 2. If so, what will that last name be? (it doesn’t even have to be one either partner was born with) It should be that simple and that equal but it is not. According to...

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Throwback Thursday – #LikeAGirl

Posted by on Dec 18, 2014 in Daily Doses, Throwback Thursday | 0 comments

Throwback Thursday – #LikeAGirl

Share this:Share on...

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Wordy Wednesday – Like A Girl

Posted by on Dec 17, 2014 in Daily Doses, Movements/Organizations, Pink is for Girls?, Society Says, Wordy Wednesday | 0 comments

Wordy Wednesday – Like A Girl

“You scream like a girl.” “You throw like a girl.” “You run like a girl.” And…what’s wrong with that? Apparently everything. As it is currently used, being told that you do anything “like a girl” is an insult. Usually uttered in a disparaging tone, the phrase is used to insult girls and boys alike. When used to insult a girl, the insultee pauses in confusion as she processes the fact that she is a girl and somehow that is a bad thing? Usually her confusion is quickly resolved and she...

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Tally Tuesday – Will You or Did You Take Your Partner’s Name?

Posted by on Dec 16, 2014 in Daily Doses, Tally Tuesdays | 0 comments

It’s time for Tally Tuesday again! Let your voice be heard on Tally Tuesdays here on Dear Daughters! Take a new survey each week! Create your free online surveys with SurveyMonkey , the world’s leading questionnaire tool. If you liked this survey, check out last week’s on McDonald’s Happy Meal toys. Share this:Share on...

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#morethanwhatyousee Monday

Posted by on Dec 15, 2014 in #morethanwhatyousee Monday, Daily Doses | 0 comments

#morethanwhatyousee Monday

Every Monday on Dear Daughters we will be celebrating #morethanwhatyousee Monday! This is when we celebrate people for who they are and not what they look like. For more information on why this is important and how to participate, please see our first ever #morethanwhatyousee Monday! I played on the @SMUHalifaxNews Huskies hockey team that won the inaugural AUAA championships in 1998! #morethanwhatyousee deardaughters.ca — Dear Daughters (@DearDaughters) December 15, 2014 Share this:Share on...

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